An Ethical Will is a document plainly understood as a legacy letter. Traditional ethical wills, originating in the Biblical period, were the responsibility of fathers to transmit ethical values to their sons. Contemporary ethical wills are written at every age, often in times of transition and personal challenge by men and women alike. – Excerpt from Life-Legacies by Rachel Freed

When I became a mother I started writing letters to my son because, at first, I was afraid I wouldn’t be up to the task of motherhood and it seemed inevitable that I’d mess it up in some way and that eventually he would do what all kids frequently do… torment their parents about all the ways they messed up their children resulting in years of therapy and thousands of dollars in “couch time”. I thought, “Wouldn’t it be nice if my son had a chance to know me as I am NOW when he is a baby because by the time he is able to have adult conversations with me I will be a vastly different person than I am now. I will be a different mom than I first was and he will never have a way to know that FIRST mommy that I used to be.”

As I wrote these letters I found myself passing on bits of advice and other things I thought were important, little things I wondered if my boys would ever sit still long enough for me to tell them, things they would probably just roll their eyes at. To be fair, I never appreciated the advice people gave me until I got well into my 20’s. I think that’s just human nature, a simple issue of maturity.

Today I ran across a web site that talks about legacy letters or ethical wills. These are documents you can write to pass on your values to your children or grandchildren as a legacy to them, just like you might pass on your grandmother’s tea set or whatever.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we all had documents like this from our fathers, mothers, grandparents, and many many more way back to hundreds of years to the past? What a fabulous legacy! Would you consider writing one to your children or other relatives?

Go check out the site at Life-Legacies. The site has some sample legacy letters as well as a free e-newsletter that contains tips that will help you make your own letters. At the site you can also read about how legacy letters can not only benefit those who come after you but how it can help you in your life today.

February 4th is Thank Your Mailperson Day! What can you do to thank the person who delivers your mail?

Please be aware that postal carriers must follow particular gift rules! Please read this article for a nice overview.

The basic idea is:

• Don’t give your postal carrier cash!
• Whatever you give them, if it’s a gift card or something similar, keep at $20 or under.

Now go forth and love the heck out of these folks who slog through the weather on a daily basis to get us our mail. Post some ideas here if you’ve got some good ones. Or tell us what you did for this day. I haven’t decided yet, but I’m getting away from the computer right this second to go figure it out! (I have two postal carriers, one at home, one at my office! I know the one at my office has a weakness for chocolate covered cherries.)

There has been a lot of buzz about the open letter from Barack Obama to his daughters. If you’ve not done so, you can read it over at Parade. It’s a great letter.

I write letters to my kids. Never as well-written as this one, but engaging, tender and hopeful. I’m not sure when they will get them, but I actually put them in the mail so they get postmarked. When the arrive back at the house I put them in a place to save them for the boys for later. I have no idea when they will get them. Hopefully I’ll know when the time is right.

I also like to write letters to the daughter of a friend of mine. Her girl is only three, but I do my best to write her on her birthday and hope my friend saves them. A little blast from the past for when she is older. I have no idea if anyone cares about stuff like that, but I like to do it.

Tell me: do you write to your kids or keep a journal that will live on long after you’re gone? Tell me all about what you do.

Have you ever heard of a round robin letter? I have never done one, but I have heard of them.

It’s a letter where you have a group of people and you basically write letters in a circle — Person 1 sends her letter to Person 2. That person writes a letter and then sends his letter AND Person 1’s letter to Person 3 who writes a letter and sends ALL the letters on to Person 4. The pattern continues until all the letters make it back to Person 1. She then removes her original letter and replaces it with a new one, then sends the whole batch on to Person 2 again. Ad infinitum.

A few years ago someone published something called a Circle Journal which was basically the same idea except you wrote in the book and sent it around. I always thought that one was a little awkward because who is the lucky one who gets to keep the book when you’re done?

The bummer with the round robin letter is that you don’t get to keep any of the other letters. On the other hand, you do end up with a selection of your own letters which is like having a diary of sorts, I suppose.

Recently I read this news article about a woman who participated in a 64-year-long round robin letter. Can you imagine??

In our links collection, I have a link to a site called Robin Flies Again. That one will take you to a 50-year-long round robin and there you can actually see some of the letters.

Go check both of these stories out. Maybe it will inspire you to start your own!

Do you have a New Year’s letter writing tradition? I’ve talked about Thanksgiving notes, Christmas newsletters and now it’s time to move on to what we can all do for the end of the year.

On New Year’s Eve, gather around with paper and pen and some drawing material for the kids. Have everyone sit down and write a letter to their future selves. You can talk about what your goals and ambitions are for the year, what you’d like to accomplish and, for fun, add some predictions in your letter about yourself (or others).

Put each letter in a separate envelope and mark them, “To be opened on New Year’s Eve 2009″. Pack the letters away with the Christmas ornaments so you won’t forget about them. When you get your Christmas stuff out for the following year, there they will be! Keep them on the mantle or somewhere handy until New Year’s Eve when you can open them and enjoy looking back through this handwritten portal to the past.

This is a fun exercise for family and friends to talk about what you accomplished in the future and to laugh over your “predictions” and to see what came true and what didn’t.

Try it out and let me know how it goes. Do you have any holiday letter writing traditions? Share your ideas with me!

(I also ran across a web site called FutureMe where you can do something similar, only by email.)